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C. Power Players Are Paying Thousands of Dollars to Find Dates - POLITICO
Inside the expensive, awkward, and sometimes even romantic world of matchmaking DC’s elite. POLITICO Politico Logo.
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Inside the expensive, awkward, and sometimes even romantic world of matchmaking DC’s elite. Illustrations by John Broadley. By Jessica M. Goldstein. 06/24/2022 04:30 AM EDT. Updated: 06/24/2022 11:24 AM EDT. Jessica M. Goldstein is a freelance writer based in Washington, D.C. She is a contributing editor to Washingtonian and a contributing writer to the Washington Post’s Arts & Style section and Magazine. I n D.C. dating, obstacles abound. Everybody is busy and nobody texts back, or they text and text but never plan a date, or they date once only to ghost. All the “moderates” are secretly conservative, a lot of the liberals are not-so-secretly annoying. The pandemic shut down the party scene, but swiping on the apps is such a drag — and isn’t really an option for D.C.’s more high-profile singles. So perhaps it’s not surprising that an old-timey way of finding love has made something of a comeback: D.C.’s single power players are enlisting matchmakers in their dating searches. You could do it, too. For several thousands of dollars a month — double what the average person spends on rent for a one-bedroom in D.C. — this matchmaker will not only seek out potential soulmates with your exact criteria in mind but will do the sort of investigative work that, coming from you, would seem invasive and creepy — trawling LinkedIn for singles with degrees from prestigious universities, or NextDoor for homeowners in affluent zip codes, or LegiStorm for Congressional staffers’ bios, salaries and contact information. They can also help you navigate the obstacles very particular to dating in D.C., like how to keep your dating life off Twitter and out of the pages of this magazine, or how to make it clear that you don’t share all of your boss’ political views. For the inside intel on how these services work and who uses them, I spent the spring calling up a murderers’ row of D.C. matchmakers. The biggest brand in town is Three Day Rule (named ironically, for the Swingers-era counsel to wait three days before calling a woman you want to see again), a national outfit that launched its D.C. branch in 2015. To be a client and all that entails — a guaranteed minimum of one match per month, plus coaching, a photoshoot and post-date debriefs — costs $5,900 for three months and $9,500 for six. (TDR also offers VIP packages, which start at $18,500 and let daters get more involved in the search and selection process.) “People like this, especially in D.C., they’re used to getting what they want. . It’s very vexing for them, and it’s very vulnerable.” Quin Woodward Pu, matchmaker at Three Day Rule. Who in the capital is signing up? When it launched in the city, TDR’s clientele was mostly 35 and up. But the demographic gets younger by the year, with many twenty-somethings now exploring what their services have to offer. Some clients are low-paid Capitol Hill staffers whose parents, the matchmakers theorize, likely spring for the service. Plenty are upper-middle-class types — lawyers, consultants, more lawyers. And about a quarter of TDR’s clientele are what Jaime Bernstein, a senior matchmaker in D.C., describes as the “very elite, high-profile power players in the D.C. scene.” These matchmakers wouldn’t be in business if they couldn’t be discreet, but they could still share a pretty detailed description of the “elite” daters on their roster. Such clients include: TV hosts, ambassadors, political fundraisers, children of senators, attorneys at the Department of Justice, high-up folks at Treasury, IMF and the SEC, owners of political consulting firms. TDR has been hired by the owner of a D.C. sports team, a speechwriter for Michelle Obama, and politicians in various stages of running for office looking for their campaign trail plus-one. Different matchmakers specialize in different demographics: Kara Laricks is an LGBTQ+ matchmaker, who has some D.C. clients dreaming of being, she told me, “half of a power couple that will be seen on the red carpet, at the Correspondents Dinner,” while Quin Woodward Pu clicks with the uber-rich, AARP-card-carrying female set: heads of foundations, heiresses. “She’s the super wealthy woman that has multiple philanthropies at one time, even if she doesn’t have a job,” Woodward Pu said. “She leads a multi-million or multi-billion-dollar organization.” Want to read more stories like this? POLITICO Weekend delivers gripping reads, smart analysis and a bit of high-minded fun every Friday. Sign up for the newsletter. These power players might be able to mint money and impeach presidents, but D.C.’s matchmakers report that, in love, the elite are as hapless as the masses, and in some ways even more so: Necessarily concerned with privacy and discretion, many won’t risk exposure by setting up profiles on Bumble or Hinge, traveling constantly for work or employed in high-security-clearance jobs (e.g. CIA, Pentagon) where they are separated all day from their personal devices, they’re hardly available for the swiping and text-flirting required to stay in the game, judged prematurely by paramours they meet in the wild who recognize them from TV, they rarely get an honest chance to make a first impression. And: At ease in positions of authority and practiced in the art of the no-comment comment, these Washingtonians aren’t exactly comfortable being vulnerable and open — which is to say, their dating acumen can trail way behind their professional prowess. “People like this, especially in D.C., they’re used to getting what they want,” said Woodward Pu. “They can work harder or smarter or get a connection for it. And this is the one place they have not been able to figure out. It’s very vexing for them, and it’s very vulnerable. People are coming to us with a level of vulnerability that they’ve probably never experienced or shown ever.” The Requests. “Cuomo was seriously, hugely popular” W oodward Pu can’t even tell me how many women have told her their number one crush is Andrew Cuomo. “During the pandemic, SO many people were like, I just love Andrew Cuomo,” she said. This was in Covid’s early days — before Cuomo resigned as governor of New York, facing likely impeachment, over 11 allegations of sexual harassment — when Cuomo would sit in front of a PowerPoint and tell a nation made insane by quarantine what day of the week it was. “And I was like, ‘You can’t be serious.’ But you are!” Woodward Pu said. “Obviously that’s not a physical interest. Or maybe it is. But Cuomo was seriously, hugely popular. I’d ask, ‘OK, why?’ And they’d say, ‘He has such a commanding presence.’” It’s not unusual for D.C. clients to mention specific names to their matchmakers like this. Typically, these asks aren’t literal so much as inspirational (or aspirational). “What women are ultimately looking for is the vibe,” said Woodward Pu. Some clients, though, do come to matchmakers with very, very specific asks. One VIP TDR client requested his matchmaker set him up with Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez — a move that perfectly illustrates the hilarious and infuriating paradox of the straight male dater: devoted enough to his would-be girlfriend to drop thousands of dollars on a matchmaking service, but apparently incapable of Googling “AOC + boyfriend?” to find out that. “It’s not just about looks. . I’m going to probably talk to 50 Disney princess girls over the next six months, and I’ll pick out the three to six that end up being the best fit for him in other ways.” Kat Markiewicz, D.C. matchmaker. “Oftentimes in D.C. guys will say, ‘this reporter, this news anchor, this woman is my dream woman,’ and we can go track her down to find her,” said Kat Markiewicz, a D.C. matchmaker who grew up in the District.
Article about date corner dating site:
C. Power Players Are Paying Thousands of Dollars to Find Dates - POLITICO
Inside the expensive, awkward, and sometimes even romantic world of matchmaking DC’s elite. POLITICO Politico Logo.
>>> GO TO SITE <<<
Inside the expensive, awkward, and sometimes even romantic world of matchmaking DC’s elite. Illustrations by John Broadley. By Jessica M. Goldstein. 06/24/2022 04:30 AM EDT. Updated: 06/24/2022 11:24 AM EDT. Jessica M. Goldstein is a freelance writer based in Washington, D.C. She is a contributing editor to Washingtonian and a contributing writer to the Washington Post’s Arts & Style section and Magazine. I n D.C. dating, obstacles abound. Everybody is busy and nobody texts back, or they text and text but never plan a date, or they date once only to ghost. All the “moderates” are secretly conservative, a lot of the liberals are not-so-secretly annoying. The pandemic shut down the party scene, but swiping on the apps is such a drag — and isn’t really an option for D.C.’s more high-profile singles. So perhaps it’s not surprising that an old-timey way of finding love has made something of a comeback: D.C.’s single power players are enlisting matchmakers in their dating searches. You could do it, too. For several thousands of dollars a month — double what the average person spends on rent for a one-bedroom in D.C. — this matchmaker will not only seek out potential soulmates with your exact criteria in mind but will do the sort of investigative work that, coming from you, would seem invasive and creepy — trawling LinkedIn for singles with degrees from prestigious universities, or NextDoor for homeowners in affluent zip codes, or LegiStorm for Congressional staffers’ bios, salaries and contact information. They can also help you navigate the obstacles very particular to dating in D.C., like how to keep your dating life off Twitter and out of the pages of this magazine, or how to make it clear that you don’t share all of your boss’ political views. For the inside intel on how these services work and who uses them, I spent the spring calling up a murderers’ row of D.C. matchmakers. The biggest brand in town is Three Day Rule (named ironically, for the Swingers-era counsel to wait three days before calling a woman you want to see again), a national outfit that launched its D.C. branch in 2015. To be a client and all that entails — a guaranteed minimum of one match per month, plus coaching, a photoshoot and post-date debriefs — costs $5,900 for three months and $9,500 for six. (TDR also offers VIP packages, which start at $18,500 and let daters get more involved in the search and selection process.) “People like this, especially in D.C., they’re used to getting what they want. . It’s very vexing for them, and it’s very vulnerable.” Quin Woodward Pu, matchmaker at Three Day Rule. Who in the capital is signing up? When it launched in the city, TDR’s clientele was mostly 35 and up. But the demographic gets younger by the year, with many twenty-somethings now exploring what their services have to offer. Some clients are low-paid Capitol Hill staffers whose parents, the matchmakers theorize, likely spring for the service. Plenty are upper-middle-class types — lawyers, consultants, more lawyers. And about a quarter of TDR’s clientele are what Jaime Bernstein, a senior matchmaker in D.C., describes as the “very elite, high-profile power players in the D.C. scene.” These matchmakers wouldn’t be in business if they couldn’t be discreet, but they could still share a pretty detailed description of the “elite” daters on their roster. Such clients include: TV hosts, ambassadors, political fundraisers, children of senators, attorneys at the Department of Justice, high-up folks at Treasury, IMF and the SEC, owners of political consulting firms. TDR has been hired by the owner of a D.C. sports team, a speechwriter for Michelle Obama, and politicians in various stages of running for office looking for their campaign trail plus-one. Different matchmakers specialize in different demographics: Kara Laricks is an LGBTQ+ matchmaker, who has some D.C. clients dreaming of being, she told me, “half of a power couple that will be seen on the red carpet, at the Correspondents Dinner,” while Quin Woodward Pu clicks with the uber-rich, AARP-card-carrying female set: heads of foundations, heiresses. “She’s the super wealthy woman that has multiple philanthropies at one time, even if she doesn’t have a job,” Woodward Pu said. “She leads a multi-million or multi-billion-dollar organization.” Want to read more stories like this? POLITICO Weekend delivers gripping reads, smart analysis and a bit of high-minded fun every Friday. Sign up for the newsletter. These power players might be able to mint money and impeach presidents, but D.C.’s matchmakers report that, in love, the elite are as hapless as the masses, and in some ways even more so: Necessarily concerned with privacy and discretion, many won’t risk exposure by setting up profiles on Bumble or Hinge, traveling constantly for work or employed in high-security-clearance jobs (e.g. CIA, Pentagon) where they are separated all day from their personal devices, they’re hardly available for the swiping and text-flirting required to stay in the game, judged prematurely by paramours they meet in the wild who recognize them from TV, they rarely get an honest chance to make a first impression. And: At ease in positions of authority and practiced in the art of the no-comment comment, these Washingtonians aren’t exactly comfortable being vulnerable and open — which is to say, their dating acumen can trail way behind their professional prowess. “People like this, especially in D.C., they’re used to getting what they want,” said Woodward Pu. “They can work harder or smarter or get a connection for it. And this is the one place they have not been able to figure out. It’s very vexing for them, and it’s very vulnerable. People are coming to us with a level of vulnerability that they’ve probably never experienced or shown ever.” The Requests. “Cuomo was seriously, hugely popular” W oodward Pu can’t even tell me how many women have told her their number one crush is Andrew Cuomo. “During the pandemic, SO many people were like, I just love Andrew Cuomo,” she said. This was in Covid’s early days — before Cuomo resigned as governor of New York, facing likely impeachment, over 11 allegations of sexual harassment — when Cuomo would sit in front of a PowerPoint and tell a nation made insane by quarantine what day of the week it was. “And I was like, ‘You can’t be serious.’ But you are!” Woodward Pu said. “Obviously that’s not a physical interest. Or maybe it is. But Cuomo was seriously, hugely popular. I’d ask, ‘OK, why?’ And they’d say, ‘He has such a commanding presence.’” It’s not unusual for D.C. clients to mention specific names to their matchmakers like this. Typically, these asks aren’t literal so much as inspirational (or aspirational). “What women are ultimately looking for is the vibe,” said Woodward Pu. Some clients, though, do come to matchmakers with very, very specific asks. One VIP TDR client requested his matchmaker set him up with Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez — a move that perfectly illustrates the hilarious and infuriating paradox of the straight male dater: devoted enough to his would-be girlfriend to drop thousands of dollars on a matchmaking service, but apparently incapable of Googling “AOC + boyfriend?” to find out that. “It’s not just about looks. . I’m going to probably talk to 50 Disney princess girls over the next six months, and I’ll pick out the three to six that end up being the best fit for him in other ways.” Kat Markiewicz, D.C. matchmaker. “Oftentimes in D.C. guys will say, ‘this reporter, this news anchor, this woman is my dream woman,’ and we can go track her down to find her,” said Kat Markiewicz, a D.C. matchmaker who grew up in the District.
