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[ART] I need your help!!! - Printable Version

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+--- Thread: [ART] I need your help!!! (/Thread-ART-I-need-your-help)

I need your help!!! - Frost - Aug 8, 2016

Hey guys im writing a book and I need your opinion on it! Im hoping to become a writer and I need to know what people think. With that said here it is:


http://wattpad.com/story/80867191-your-dream

RE: I need your help!!! - wundrweapon - Aug 8, 2016

I will go ahead and read this more thoroughly later, but at a glance, it looks very well done

RE: I need your help!!! - Frost - Aug 8, 2016

(Aug 8, 2016, 08:27 PM)wundrweapon Wrote: I will go ahead and read this more thoroughly later, but at a glance, it looks very well done

Thank you! Please tell me what you think when your done Smile

RE: I need your help!!! - croissant - Aug 9, 2016

Hey @"MistressGlaceon" I quite enjoyed your story! Just a few comments that I think could help you from my literature class experience.

1- The story is quite interesting indeed and very unique, but the way you're writting it is a bit strange; generally, you would want to a narrator that is either in the story, or an omniscient narrator that basically follows the characters, but using the reader as a narrator can work, but is generally harder and can sometimes end up a bit awkward.

2-The word choice was pretty good; you used enough adjectives and such so the reader can understand the situation better while also giving a more familiar vibe, which suits pretty well your story.

Other than that, there's some grammar/writting mistakes but that's just nitpicking. Good job on this one, and good luck on being a writer, I'd also love to be one :]

P.S.: Sorry for any grammar mistakes or weird sentences, I'm french and I sometimes mess up.

RE: I need your help!!! - Frost - Aug 9, 2016

@le2017 its fine and thank you so much, it really helps when you guys tell me your opinion.

RE: I need your help!!! - croissant - Aug 9, 2016

(Aug 9, 2016, 07:04 AM)MistressGlaceon Wrote: @le2017 its fine and thank you so much, it really helps when you guys tell me your opinion.

Glad I could help @"MistressGlaceon" :]

RE: I need your help!!! - MagicalMops - Aug 10, 2016

(Aug 9, 2016, 07:02 AM)le2017 Wrote: Hey @"MistressGlaceon" I quite enjoyed your story! Just a few comments that I think could help you from my literature class experience.

1- The story is quite interesting indeed and very unique, but the way you're writting it is a bit strange; generally, you would want to a narrator that is either in the story, or an omniscient narrator that basically follows the characters, but using the reader as a narrator can work, but is generally harder and can sometimes end up a bit awkward.

2-The word choice was pretty good; you used enough adjectives and such so the reader can understand the situation better while also giving a more familiar vibe, which suits pretty well your story.

Other than that, there's some grammar/writting mistakes but that's just nitpicking. Good job on this one, and good luck on being a writer, I'd also love to be one :]

P.S.: Sorry for any grammar mistakes or weird sentences, I'm french and I sometimes mess up.
^^^^
That

Lol i'm horrible at giving constructive feedback, but i'd definitely read it once it's finished  :D

RE: I need your help!!! - Tomatoman1 - Aug 10, 2016

Nice story! I want to know how it ends :P

RE: I need your help!!! - SenpaisLittleEevee - Aug 31, 2016

[Image: latest?cb=20121003143658&path-prefix=fr]

Cewl

RE: I need your help!!! - Hatonacat - Sep 12, 2016

Its really good.